Yaakov Avinu

YAAKOV AVINU

by HaRav Shlomo Aviner

1. The Man whose Entire Life was Contrary to His Will
2. The Man whose Entire Life was Distress
3. Objective Crisis and Subjective Crisis
4. Yaakov Avinu Repaired the Guile of the Snake
5. Yaakov Avinu’s Bed was Whole
6. Twelve Shades
7. Yaakov Avinu Builds a Nation
8. “I am Esav, your first-born”
9. The Secret of Opposites
10. Sensory Integration
11. Yaakov Avinu – The Middle Man
12. Yaakov Established Ma’ariv
13. Everything is for the Best
14. To be Your Servant in all Situations
15. I Did Not Take away Free Choice

1. The Man whose Entire Life was Contrary to His Will

It is possible to refer to Yaakov Avinu as “the man above crisis.”  In truth, Yaakov Avinu’s entire life was full of crises.  The definition of a crisis is anything that is contrary to a person’s will.  A person’s will can be evil or it can be good.  Life is constructed in such a way that it is not always according to a person’s will.  There are some people who only experience one crisis during the course of a lifetime, there are others who experience one crisis every year and still others who experience crises more often.  But for Yaakov Avinu, crises were routine.  He knew about crises while still in the womb.  Yaakov was set to come out of his mother’s womb first, but it transpired that his twin brother Esav came out first “with his hand grasping on to Esav’s heel” (Bereshit 25:26).  Reality was not according to his will but he did not give in, he held on to Esav’s heel.  Although he was unable to prevent it, Yaakov still knew that he was the first-born.  He therefore waited for the opportunity to straighten that which was crooked.  And then, when Esav came in from the field, Yaakov said to his brother: “Sell, this day, your birthright to me” (ibid. 25:31).  This is surprising: is Yaakov a thief?  No, he was taking what was rightfully his.  Even though he paid for it, it was still his.  He paid for it with a bowl of lentils and a grudge that gripped Esav to the point that he wanted to kill him.  All of this was obviously not pleasant for Yaakov, it was contrary to his will, but he would not give up on the right of the first born, since it was completely his.  Furthermore, Esav himself said: “What use is the birthright to me?” (ibid. 25:32).

Later on, the blessing was rightfully his.  And again – contrary to his will – Esav was set to receive the blessing in his stead from their father Yitzchak.  His mother, Rivka, called to him: “Your curse will be upon me, my son, just listen to my voice” (ibid. 26:13), i.e. all of the complications that are bound up with this deceptive act will be on me and my head!  This implies that if it were not so, Yaakov would have taken the blame on himself.  But Rivka exempted him.  There is certainly nothing greater than meriting Yitzchak’s curse!   Yaakov was saved from the curse, but Esav still wanted to kill him.  Not only was there grudge and hatred – “He deceived me these two times, he took my birthright and now he took away my blessing” (ibid. 27:36) – but now Esav wanted to kill him.  Leaving Israel was also contrary to his will.  Without any choice, he fled from his brother, following his mother’s command.

So too, when he comes to Charan, to the house of his uncle Lavan, he meets Rachel.  Rachel warns him: Beware of my father, he is a deceiver!  Yaakov responds to her: “Let your mind be at ease.  I am his brother in deception!” (Rashi on ibid. 29:12).  I know how to maneuver, how to beware of deceivers, “With the merciful you will show yourself merciful.  With an upright man, you will show yourself to be upright.  With the pure, you will show yourself to be pure.  And with the perverse, you will show yourself to be subtle” (Tehillim 18:27).  Yaakov did not intend to give in.  But an additional complication arose, also contrary to his will: Rachel had mercy on Leah, her older sister, who Lavan included in his scheme.  Rachel took the secret code, which Yaakov gave her to avoid being tricked, and gave it to Leah so she would not be shamed (Rashi to ibid. 29:25) – “And behold, in the morning, it was Leah!” (ibid.).  This is truly a major crisis and certainly contrary to his will, since “I will work for you for seven years for Rachel” (ibid. 18) – for Rachel and not for Leah.  But it was not meant to be.  The two of them will be like one: “Complete the week of this one and we will give you this one too” (ibid. 27).  Now everything was even more complicated and major tension evolved, “And Hashem saw that Leah was hated” (ibid. 31).  It was not active hatred, G-d forbid, but rather “And he loved Rachel more than Leah” (ibid. 30).  He loved Leah, but he loved Rachel more.  Loving less is not a great thing, but loving more is.  Regardless, Leah felt hated, and tension exited.

An additional complication – Rachel was barren.  Bilhah, her maid-servant, enters the picture, as does Zilphah, Leah’s maid-servant, and the tension grows further.  And then there is the issue of livelihood, for Yaakov works for Lavan.  As is known, Lavan was evil, “Your father mocked and changed my wages tens of times” (ibid. 31:7).  But Yaakov does not give in here either: “If he said: ‘Speckled ones shall be your wages,’ the entire flock would give birth to speckled ones and if he said: ‘Ones with rings [in their fur] shall be your wages,’ the entire flock would give birth to ones with rings” (ibid. 8).  “And Yaakov saw that the face of Lavan was not toward him as it had been yesterday” (ibid. 2).  Yaakov knew that Lavan wanted to conspire against him.  It was therefore time to leave.  This was obviously under the directive of Hashem.  Yaakov flees from Lavan, Lavan pursues and catches him, but – Baruch Hashem, everything works out this time.

1. The Man whose Entire Life was Distress

The time now comes for meeting his brother Esav.  Yaakov, his wives, his sons and all of his possessions are on the way to the Land of Israel, and Esav is waiting to kill him. He has four hundred men with him.  Is Yaakov really going to continue on his way?  Why doesn’t he delay his return to the Land of Israel until the anger subsides?  Hashem commanded him to go and he is going, even into the face of danger.  As is known, the mitzvah of settling the Land of Israel exists even in a state of danger and it applies at all times (Ramban, additions to the Sefer Ha-Mitzvot of the Rambam, positive mitzvah #4.  Le-Netivot Yisrael of our Rabbi, Ha-Rav Tzvi Yehudah Ha-Cohain Kook vol. 1, p. 181 and p. 210 and many other places).  This is how it was throughout all of the generations: during the time of Avraham Avinu and time of Yitzchak Avinu and now during the time of Yaakov Avinu.  The new and innovative teaching that “saving life supercedes the Land of Israel” is therefore most surprising.  Who invented this strange statement?  It is obviously not a proper idea.

Yaakov thus heads into the face of danger on the way to the Land of Israel to meet Esav and his four hundred men.  He is also entrapped in a personal danger – he struggled with the angel the entire night and – Baruch Hashem – overcomes him, but he pays a price for the struggle: he limped on his hip.  Rachel, whom he loved so much, then dies on the way.  This was certainly contrary to his will.  And when he arrives in Shechem and desires to settle down, the episode of Dinah, his daughter, befalls him.  This is horrible.  His two sons cunningly kill all of the males of Shechem.  This is also very hard: what did you (my sons) do?  “You have troubled me to make me odious among the nations of the Land.  And I am few in number and they will gather and strike me” (ibid. 34:30).

Then there were wars.  This is not explicitly mentioned in the Torah, but is hinted at and written in the midrash (for example, Bereshit Rabbah 81:4).  “And they travelled, and the fear of G-d fell upon the cities around them, and they did not pursue the Children of Yaakov” (ibid. 35:5).  If the fear of G-d was upon the cities, Yaakov surely “took care” of their inhabitant in such a way that fear descended upon them.  The Torah states: “Which I took from the hand of the Amorite with my sword and bow” (ibid. 48:22 and Bereshit Rabbah 80:9).    This implies that Yaakov waged war.

And finally, “And Yaakov dwelled” (ibid. 37:1). Yaakov wanted to settle down in tranquility, but the anger over Yosef grasped him (Rashi ibid.).  There is no peace!  There is now tension between the children themselves.  Yosef brings an evil report to Yaakov and his brothers hate him.  In the end, Yosef disappears, “dies.”  “Do you recognize your son’s coat or not?” (ibid. 37:32).    And furthermore, there is famine in the Land.  They go down to Egpyt to get food, Binyamin is taken and then Shimon – enough!  How much distress can one person handle?!

The general principle is that Yaakov Avinu’s entire life was filled with crisis.

1. Objective Crisis and Subjective Crisis

We already defined a crisis as an event which occurs contrary to a person’s will, i.e. everyone experiences crisis in their lives.  No one lives exactly according to his will, even though all of his desires may be good.  The first question is thus: how many?  But the more essential question is: how do you respond to the crisis?  There are two different types of crisis: an objective crisis and a subjective crisis.  An objective crisis is a crisis which occurs contrary to the will of a person and also contrary to the will of all people.  For example, a person breaks his foot, receives a cast, is limited and physically challenged.  And he then experiences the subjective crisis – how will I respond to what has occurred?  The objective crisis is sometimes quite minute and the response is huge in its force.  And sometimes it is the opposite: the crisis is truly great and the response is minimal.  Both of these are not good.  If a person’s close relative dies and he does not sit “shiva,” does not mourn and does not eulogize him – he is emotionally unhealthy.  But sometimes, people make a huge commotion over nothing.

The question is therefore how a person responds to a crisis: does he break, fold, despair or continue on in strength.  This follows what Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Satnov (Cheshbon Ha-Nefesh, chap. 2) writes regarding patience and how a person deals with tragedy: when a bad incident occurs to you, do not make it worse by despairing over nothing.  The world was not created for prophets who know what to expect ahead of time.  Sometimes one cannot beware of something bad occurring, but if it has already occurred, one can beware not to make it worse.

1. Yaakov Avinu Repaired the Guile of the Snake

Yaakov experienced distresses and crises, but he did not panic or complain – he continued on!   From the moment of his birth and even beforehand, he continued on: “his hand held Esav’s heel” (Bereshit 25:26).  In the most complicated situations, he utilized different tactics.  The Shelah writes that Yaakov repaired the guile of the snake.  The snake was deceptive, and Yaakov Avinu also used deception.  The snake however acted deceitfully for evil purposes (see Shmuel 2 13:3 with Metzudat David, Rashi and Ralbag), while Yaakov Avinu used it for good (see Rashi on Bereshit 27:35 and ibid. 34:13).  It is true that sometimes one must use the trait of deception.  The Torah testifies about Yaakov Avinu: “And Yaakov was a wholesome man, who dwelled in tents” (ibid. 25:22).  It is rare that the Torah informs us that a particular person is wholesome or kind.  The Torah also testifies about Moshe: “And the man Moshe was extremely humble, more than any man on earth” (Bemidbar 12:3).  This is rare, since we may think that Yaakov was not wholesome.  The proof: we see various times that he deceives Lavan.  Not true!  The Torah informs us: Yaakov is wholesome: “his heart and his mouth were the same, he was not duplicitous” (Rashi ibid.).  This is not his “profession.”  His profession is to be a wholesome person!  A wholesome person sometimes needs to deceive, “And with the perverse, you will show yourself to be subtle.”  He sometimes had to dress in Esav’s clothing.  And what he has to do, he does without concern.

1. Yaakov Avinu’s Bed was Whole

From where did Yaakov muster the strength to survive the most difficult and complicated situations? – with his brother, his father, his mother and his sons (which is the most difficult trial of all).  Furthermore, all of his sons were righteous!  Twelve sons and all of them were inside.  Yishmael was outside, Esav was outside, but the twelve sons of Yaakov – even though they sinned – were all inside!  This follows the statement of our Sages (Pesachim 56a and Tanchuma, Vayechi 8): Yaakov’s bed was whole.  This was unlike Avraham’s bed, which contained refuse, which came out in the form of Yishmael.  This does not mean that the refuse of Yishmael dwelled in Avraham Avinu, but the potential existed in him.  This is similar to a box of matches which has the potential to burn down a building.  The purpose of the matches is not to burn down buildings — they have a positive purpose, but one must be careful that the matches are not used to destroy on account of negligence.  This is also like a healthy person who carries a recessive genetic disease.  It is hidden.  He is completely healthy, but the hidden disease can burst forth one day.  It is possible to say that Avraham Avinu was a “carrier” of trouble, even though he himself was the holy of holies.  And this hidden trouble appeared in Yishmael.  And Yitzchak was a “carrier” of trouble which appeared in Esav.

1. Twelve Shades

And Yaakov Avinu was whole.  He thus redeemed Avraham (see Yeshayahu 29:22 and Sanhedrin 19b).  He retroactively justified Avraham and Yitzchak.  He also succeeded in holding the brothers together.  Yosef brought an evil report – Yaakov listened.  The brothers hated Yosef – Yaakov waited.  He united everyone together, “he guarded this thing in his heart” (Bereshit 37:11): everything will work out in the end.  And indeed, as is known, it did work out: “Listen Yisrael, Hashem our G-d, Hashem is one” – just as there is only One in your heart, so too is there only One in our heart (Pesachim 56a).  We are united, Baruch Hashem.  Yaakov Avinu divided the brothers into their shades – this one receives this blessing and this one receives that blessing.  No one is pushed aside for another.  This is unlike with Yitzchak.  “Your seed shall be called through Yitzchak” (Bereshit 21:12) – through part of Yitzchak and not all of the descendants of Yitzchak (Sanhedrin 59b).  “For the son of this hand-maiden will not inherit with my son, with Yitzchak” (ibid. verse 10).  And Esav was also outside.  But regarding Yaakov Avinu, everyone was inside.  There are different shades among them, as is clarified in the blessing of Yaakov to his sons (Parashat Vayechi), which later received an “approbation” from Moshe Rabbenu (Parashat Ve-Zot Ha-Berachah).  Each tribe and its blessing.  The Nation of Israel is assembled from twelve different shades, as Maran Ha-Rav writes rhetorically: “A war of brothers.”  There are wars between enemies and people who hate each other: us or Yishmael!  Us or Esav!  But there is also a war of brothers: The Halachah is like the Rambam or the Tosafot.  This is a war, but a war between brothers.  There is a war between the inclinations: the good inclination against the evil inclination – a war of enemies.  But there can also be a war within the good inclination: to learn Gemara or Kuzari?  To live in my parent’s house or my in-laws’ house?  I am torn – a war of brothers.  A brotherly war can also end very badly, as with Yosef being thrown into the pit and sold to the Yishmaelites.  But this is not necessarily true.  It can work out, as truly happened in the end.  Both are the words of the Living G-d: Yaakov divided each of his sons into different tribe, as did Moshe Rabbenu much later: “Each man in his camp and under his flag” (Bemidbar 1:52).

1. Yaakov Avinu Builds a Nation

Without us paying attention, an additional factor exists: Yaakov Avinu is not only engaged in building his family – he is building a nation!  And what Yaakov Avinu is building now has to stand through the course of all generations.  The smallest blemish can be a catastrophe.  If a man builds a multi-story building – a small defect below can cause the building to be crooked higher up and it can collapse.  The Rambam says in “Moreh Nevuchim”: our forefathers knew that by establishing their family, they were laying the foundation to build a nation.  This is an explicit verse: “And I will make you a great Nation” (Bereshit 12:2).  Avraham Avinu knew this and Yitzchak Avinu knew this.  Avraham removed Yishmael from his midst, even though it was extremely difficult.  And Yitzchak removed Esav.  And in the end, who truly removed them – the women, who understood through their prophetic senses that these individuals were currently not to participate in building the world.  It was theoretically possible, but not in the actual here and now.

A great weight therefore rested on Yaakov Avinu: to build the Jewish Nation, which needed to include all of the different shades.  Yaakov was therefore married to two women.  Perhaps someone will raise the difficulty that the two wives appeared on account of a conflict and not because it was the preferred path.  He wanted to marry Rachel – “And behold it was Leah!?”  On account of this deceit, he was not going to marry Rachel?  Yaakov also married Rachel, and tension was born between the wives and their sons.  And with all of this, we see that this was completely Hashem’s will: “Like Rachel and Leah, both of whom, built up the House of Israel” (Rut 4:11)!  And this included the maid-servants and their children – all of them built the House of Israel together.  Building the family of Yaakov was complicated.  Building the House of Israel – the Nation of Israel – was even more complicated, and it therefore required all of our strengths together.

1. “I am Esav, your first-born”

There is still a great wonder here.  Didn’t Yitzchak Avinu understand who Esav was?  Didn’t he see that he was evil and fundamentally corrupt?  Maran Ha-Rav Kook explains Yitzchak’s reasoning (Midbar Shur, Derish #29).  Yitzchak Avinu understood that a Nation was being born here, and its purpose was to spread a light among the nations, a Nation including not only those who learned in the House of Study.   There are times when there is a need to destroy evil by the sword and with war.  Yaakov Avinu was a “wholesome man, who dwelled in tents.”  His strength was not physical.  In contrast, Esav was physically strong. He knew how to hunt and how to wage war.  The Nation greatly needed this trait at this time.  If so, perhaps Esav was the heir?  Although Esav was evil, he could repent. In order to create a Nation, there is a need for “Esavs.”

But Rivka saw differently through prophecy, and taught her younger son, Yaakov.  Yaakov came before his father and informed him: I understand, father.  “I am Esav, your first-born!”  I am Esav!  When need be – I am Esav.  I am not Esav in my inner soul.  I am still gentle and wholesome within but when there is a need, I wear Esav’s clothing.  Our forefathers knew that they were building a Nation, that they were the root of a Nation.  Yaakov Avinu was the father of the Tribes as well as the actual father of the Nation.  He was thus a double man.  He possessed both his blessing and Esav’s blessing.  He had both his wife and Esav’s wife, i.e. Leah, who had weak eyes from crying since she thought that she would be Esav’s wife (Rashi on Bereshit 29:17).  Yaakov Avinu had to connect these two extremes to survive all of the conflicts.

1. The Secret of Opposites

How was Yaakov able to succeed?  This secret was already implanted among his father and mother, who were completely different from one another.  This idea is explained by the Maharal on the Mishnah (Derech Chaim on Pirkei Avot 1:12): “The world stands on three things: on the Torah, on Divine service and on acts of loving kindness.”  Yitzchak’s trait was Divine service.  Rivka’s trait was acts of loving kindness.  Eliezer, Avraham’s servant, searched for someone like her for Yitzchak: “Drink, my master, and I will also give your camels a drink” (Bereshit 24:14).  She ran from him to the trough, and then to the well and back to the camels, over and over.  “And the young woman to whom I say: ‘Please lower your jug so I may drink,’ and she replies: ‘Drink, and I will also give water to your camels, You have designated her for your servant, Yitzchak” (24:14) – she is suitable for him because she possesses the trait of loving-kindness (Rashi ibid.).  Rivka was the opposite of Yitzchak in her fundamental character.  It seems like an impossible match.  They did not have children for twenty years, but when they had a child, he was armed with both of their talents.

Avraham and Sarah were similar.  They both possessed the trait of loving-kindness.  Avraham converted the men and Sarah converted the women.  But Yitzchak and Rivka were fundamentally different.  One should know that the more one’s parents are opposites and different from one another, the greater the child’s strength to overcome crises.  Yaakov was torn between his parents, as in the brotherly war mentioned above.  It is good to be a hidden righteous person or a revealed one – but who am I?  Where do I stand between them?  This is similar to a person standing with his legs close together – he is less stable.  If he spreads his legs a little, he has a stronger stance.  Another comparison: a person with only one eye lacks perception.  When a person has two eyes, they have greater depth.  Furthermore, the closer one’s eyes, the less depth he has.  While a greater distance between them allows for greater depth.

1. Sensory Integration

An example of this idea can be seen through the wayward son (Sanhedrin 71a): “And bring him to the elders of his city…and say…our son is wayward, he does not listen to our voice” (Devarim 21:19-20).  Rabbi Yehudah says: In order for him to be in the category of a wayward son, the parents must have the same voice, appearance and stature.  The Maharal says (Chiddushei Aggadot ibid.): That is it!  If the parents are different and each pulls in his own direction, is it such a surprise that he is a wayward son?  Although the Halachah does not follow Rabbi Yehudah, we clearly learn that if the parents are different, the child is torn.  In order for the two eyes to see properly, there is a need for sensory integration.  If a person lacks this, he is drunk and each eye sees something different.  He sees double.  If parents are different, there is thus a need for integration, and when this exists, the children are firm in their souls.  By the way, the same is true from a biological-genetic perspective.  If two parents are cousins, generation after generation, the body is prevented from battling new bacteria.  If there are preexisting bacteria, there is no problem since both parents are immunized.  But regarding new bacteria, a person loses the ability to withstand them.  This applies biologically, psychologically and spiritually.

1. Yaakov Avinu – The Middle Man

The Maharal (Derech Chaim ibid.) thus explains that since Yaakov’s parents were opposites – loving-kindness on the one side and Divine service on the other – he grew in the middle.  Since Yaakov Avinu was the middle man, he was capable of standing firm.  When a crisis arrived from the right, his powers from the left allowed him to withstand it, and vise-versa.  And when a crisis came straight on, he stood firmly in the middle.  The reason is that Yaakov Avinu learned Torah in two contradictory yeshivot.  He learned in the yeshiva of Avraham Avinu and he learned in the yeshiva of Yitzchak Avinu.  He also later learned in the yeshiva of Shem and Ever, which is close to an “ethical university,” where he learned universal ethical wisdom, which was passed through the generations from Adam Ha-Rishon to Noach.  But he first learned in the yeshiva of Avraham Avinu and the yeshiva of Yitzchak Avinu, as it is written: “A wholesome man, who dwelled in tents” (Bereshit 25:27).  What is the meaning of “tents”?  Shouldn’t it say “who dwelled in a tent”?  No, he dwelled in two tents.  He learned in two yeshivot.  Rabbi Yosef Gikatilla explains in the book “Sha’arei Orah” (sha’ar 5, p. 57b) that Yaakov Avinu’s trait was the secret of the middle trait: it is similar to the central leaf of the lulav (“Tiyomet” in Hebrew), which holds the two sides together.  It is well-known that according to Halachah, if the “Tiyomet” is missing, the lulav is invalid.  The two sides must be connected by the “Tiyomet.”  Thus, Yaakov Avinu connected the two tents: the tent of Avraham, which is kindness and the tent of Yitzchak, which is strict justice.  Yaakov held the right and left together in the middle to the point that Avraham grasped Yaakov from the right and Yitzchak grasped Yaakov from the left.  This is the secret of the middle, which the Rambam discusses (Shemoneh Perakim, chap. 4): the middle path is the path of Hashem.  Don’t be an extremist.  Extremism damages even the most precious thing in the world.  But wasn’t Avraham Avinu an extremist?  G-d forbid. Avraham Avinu was the holy of holies.  But a child who possessed an extremist “Avrahamness” came from him – Yishmael.  And Yitzchak was the holy of holies, but a child who possessed extremist “Yitzchakness” came from him: Esav, who is Rome, who is Christianity, who is Western Civilization – who engaged in murder without pause.  And Yaakov Avinu – he is the middle path.

1. Yaakov Established Ma’ariv

The Gemara (Berachot 26a) states that Avraham established Shacharit, Yitzchak established Minchah and Yaakov established Ma’ariv.  But the Tosafot explain that Avraham Avinu also prayed Minchah after Yitzchak established it.  Then what is the difference between them?  It is the emphasis that this one established Shacharit and that this one established Minchah and that this one established Maariv.  Maariv is when it is night, dark, complicated.  One must beware.  Protect us, Hashem!  During Ma’ariv, we do not connect the Redemption (mentioned in the prayer “Ga’al Yisrael”) to the Shemoneh Esrei but recite “Hashkeveinu” (a plea for protection) in the middle.  At Ma’ariv, there is an interruption (unlike at Shachrit): Beware!

1. Everything is for the Best

Let us return to our subject.  Yaakov Avinu was the middle path.  He was armed with the strength of Avraham and the strength of Yitzchak, whether from his parents or his learning in yeshiva.  He was therefore prepared to stand firmly and not to stumble in any situation.  And all of his sons were also inside!  This is the most difficult of work.  But there were crises.  A crisis, as we explained, is a situation which is contrary to the human will.  How do I emotionally digest such an experience?  Do I wage war?  I will certainly wage war.  If I am sick – I go to a doctor.  If I broke my leg – I put on a cast.  But how do I not break subjectively, psychologically?

This is explained in the book “Mesillat Yesharim” in the chapter on righteousness (chap. 19).  There are two solutions.  There is one solution which is equally available to all and there is another which is for unique individuals.  The solution available to all: everything is for the best!  Whatever Hashem does, He does for the best.  How so?  I do not know, but it is for the best.  The surgeon causes you pain.  Do you think that he enjoys it?  G-d forbid.  He cuts your skin and by doing so, he saves your life.  After all, you know the doctor – he loves you.  If he hurts you – thank him, hug him and kiss him.  If he hurts you, it is a sign that you truly have something very severe.  If it were not so, he would not have hurt you.  Therefore, love him and do not hate him in your heart, and do not show him that you hate him.  Studies show that a high percentage of those who commit suicide are dentists, because of the enmity that is conveyed to them by the patients out of a fear of the procedure.  It breaks their spirit to the point that they are lost.  It is a fact.  This is the solution that is equal to all: everything is for the best!  You will understand in the end: Yaakov, how good it was that you fled from your brother, since you then met Rachel and Leah.  Everything will be clarified in the end, it just requires patience.  “I give thanks to you, Hashem, although You were angry with me” (Yeshayahu 12:1).  It once happened that two men went on a business trip.  One of them had to return because he got a thorn in his foot, and he cursed and blasphemed.  He later found out that his fellow’s ship sank.  He gave thanks and praise (Yalkut Shimoni, Yeshayahu 417).

1. To be Your Servant in all Situations

And there is the second solution, which is at a higher level, which is for exceptional individuals.  These individuals have no personal concerns.  They are only concerned about the Master of the Universe.  And a person such as this will therefore say: what do I care about the distresses?  What do I care if it is against my will?  Isn’t the ideal to serve Hashem? What prevents me from serving Him?

In my youth, I once went to the mikveh with my uncle.  It was a big city outside of Israel and it had only one mikveh.  It was Erev Yom Kippur, and there was a long line to get in.  My uncle lost his patience.  The attendant looked at him and spit out: “My master, you’re impatient.”  My uncle said: “The time, the time.”  The attendant said: “Nu, what time does my master have today on Erev Yom Kippur?”  My uncle said: “My master does not understand, one needs to repent.”  The attendant got up from his place, pulled my uncle aside gently into a corner and said: “Please, repent.  Who is disturbing my master from repenting?!  Who is distracting his honor from serving Hashem?” Correct.  You can serve Hashem whether healthy or sick, wealthy or poor, hated or beloved, married to a good woman or to an evil woman, etc.

1. I Did Not Take away Free Choice

Who truly prevents you from serving Hashem?  You can serve Him under all circumstances.  “A time to give birth and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot” (kohelet 3:2) – it is possible to serve Hashem in every situation. Nothing prevents you.  The Master of the Universe can leave you bare, without money, without family and without a house, but one thing cannot be taken from you – free choice.  It is not because it cannot be taken.  Hashem can take it away if He so desires, as he did with Pharaoh, according to one interpretation (see Rambam, Hilchot Teshuvah 6:3).  But Hashem does not want to do this.  There is therefore nothing preventing you from serving Hashem.  On the contrary, the Ramchal (ibid.) says that it is similar to an officer in an elite combat unit.  The combat officer loves difficult missions.  The more difficult and complex the mission, the greater he can prove his loyalty and love.

Perhaps I should therefore invite distress upon myself?  No, do not invite it.  It will come on its own.  You also do not know which type will come, and if you can withstand it.  Therefore, do not invite it!  If Hashem sends a distress, he also provides the ability to withstand it, but you should not “volunteer.”  Remember: Yaakov Avinu was able to withstand all of the difficulties by remaining on the middle path.